Train of the Damned

Today on the subway, after a long day of hard work, following a long (last) week of hard work, a man came onto my subway car armed with a Bible.

I held my breath, waiting to be excoriated.

"Women who wear pant," he intoned in an unplaceable accent, "is abomination before God."

I swallowed a deep sigh of relief -- safe -- and glanced furtively around the car, taking silent, self-righteous stock of who would be Saved and who would Not. Three on the first sweep, with more likely waiting in the periphery.

"That is right," he intoned once again, slapping the Bible with his left hand. "Just like homosexuality...women wearing pant is abomination before the Lord."

Fuck. Three sets of eyes trained right back at me. Three cocked eyebrows.

Failing to find a willing, trousered ally with whom to share a quick one-liner -- "Well, looks like we're both screwed" -- I took solace in the fact that, in this subway car anyways, there were more of Them than there were of Me.